I heard back from SIM today. They are asking for clarification for some of my answers to the application. I'm looking at the list, and I'm not really sure how to simplify.
This happened to come while I was at work today, so I mentioned it to Debbi. She asked, "Did you think it would be this hard?"
No. I did not think it would be this hard. I thought that if God called me, He would open the door quickly and obviously! But that's not how it works. I know that God has called me. I know that He has a place in mind, where He wants me to serve. I know I must wait, be patient, and keep praying. But I can't help but think, am I missing something? Is there somewhere that I am supposed to go, that I haven't considered yet? People keep mentioning places, maybe I need to seriously look into them.
I don't know.
So, I am asking you to pray for me. Pray for this journey. Pray that God will place me where He wants me, and that the door will open, and it will be obvious when it is time. Just to be clear, I am not giving up on SIM. I've come this far, I'm going to see it through the application process. But for the first time, I realize, they might say no. And that's okay! I'm okay with that! I just want to know where to go.
In the meantime, I keep fundraising, and it is going well! A lot of people have been donating to this mission, which is incredible since I still can't answer where I'm going, or what I will be doing. But I know that in one year from today, I will be serving in mission somewhere, waking up to something, and knowing that God placed me there, and enjoying the road that He took me on to get there!
Hey Carly, I miss you. I want to share a little story with you. When my mother was called as a missionary to serve her LDS mission, she was sent to Guatemala some 30 years ago. She was having a hard time getting the paperwork ready and in the meantime she received a second calling to share the gospel in Paraguay. Did this mean that the revelation that inspired her first calling was wrong? No! A few months into her mission, a civil war broke out in Guatemala. God is all knowing and He knows the future, but He is also our loving Heavenly Father and I think He sometimes hopes that things will turn out different than they do. After all, we all have agency, regardless of our tendencies and whatever caused that war maybe could have been avoided. The reasons for your current trials might not be something this obvious, but I have faith that there is a reason for it. I hope you are well, and I will pray for you too. Our God is after all, the same God. Good luck! And please let me know if you need anything.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Jana Sardoni